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Constructive vs
Destructive.
Your spouse does something that you consider to be
unkind, unfair, unloving and you feel angry. Why? Because you are made in
God's image and when God encounters injustice, He too feels angry.
You too have a concern for right and when you
encounter injustice, you feel angry. The purpose is to motivate you to
take constructive action. The problem is that we often take destructive
action and make things worse. When angry, our question should be:
"What productive action could I take?"
Another problem is that often our anger is
distorted. That is, it is not based on actual wrong doing by our spouse,
but rather some petty inconvenience. She forgot to take your shirts to the
laundry. He showed up 30 minutes late for your dinner reservation. You are
angry, but your spouse has committed no immoral act. They have simply been
human. Forgetting is human. Your anger is real and needs to be shared, but
it does not call for repentance on the part of your spouse. It calls for
understanding.
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