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Understanding Quality
Time Not Quantity Time
"I don’t understand my wife," he
said. "I do everything I know to show her that I love her, and yet
she complains that she doesn’t feel loved." How do you express your
love for her, I asked? "Well, for one thing," he said, "I
get home from work before she does, so I get dinner started every night.
After dinner, I wash the dishes except on Wednesday night. I have a
meeting that night. I do all the vacuuming because her back is bad. I do
all the yard work because she is allergic to pollen."
He went on telling me what he did for her. When he
got through, I’m asking myself, "What does this woman do?"
There was nothing left for her to do. He said, "I do all these things
for her and yet she says she doesn’t feel loved. I don’t know what
else to do." What does she complain about, I asked? "She says,
that I don’t ever talk to her," he said. "I talk to her all
the time. I don’t know what she is talking about."
Do you know what his wife wanted? She wanted him to
sit on the couch and talk to her fifteen minutes a night. She wanted
Quality Time. When the lights finally came on in his mind he said,
"And to think, I could have been sitting on the couch all these years
instead of doing all this stuff." Learning your spouse’s love
language makes all the difference.
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